No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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