I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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