I faked an abortion last night.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize