Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize