Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
