toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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