He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
