I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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