cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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