Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
