remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
You took a bar mat shot.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize