Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I want her autograph on my taint
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize