she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
