Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i think my tv is drunk
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
