I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
You did what with his pubic hair?
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
