hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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