Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize