I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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