I love black thongs
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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