So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
