So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
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