Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize