dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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