she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Randomize
