Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Farmville is her only friend.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize