I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
