Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
