Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
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