Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
