i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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