At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
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