So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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