Texts From Last Night

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  (707): View more from California

  Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?

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  (707): Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried? http://tfl.nu/0ae3
  Replies (21) Good night (602) Bad night (1497)
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  (559): View more from California

  Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.

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  (559): Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina. http://tfl.nu/zft1
  Replies (19) Good night (942) Bad night (2750)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.

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  (850): I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off. http://tfl.nu/irzu
  Replies (22) Good night (2967) Bad night (672)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.

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  (678): If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class. http://tfl.nu/m667
  Replies (20) Good night (4414) Bad night (814)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom

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  (206): He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom http://tfl.nu/tvji
  Replies (25) Good night (1482) Bad night (4325)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"

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  (662): I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits" http://tfl.nu/79pd
  Replies (40) Good night (11470) Bad night (1238)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.

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  (407): I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin. http://tfl.nu/d7w8
  Replies (7) Good night (4037) Bad night (1166)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.

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  (770): Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers. http://tfl.nu/y8q2
  Replies (9) Good night (2109) Bad night (1585)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO

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  (303): Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO http://tfl.nu/1w33
  Replies (6) Good night (1640) Bad night (887)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class

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  (269): I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class http://tfl.nu/65qj
  Replies (7) Good night (2590) Bad night (645)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.

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  (330): We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us. http://tfl.nu/w3kf
  Replies (2) Good night (1065) Bad night (336)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes

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  (210): hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes http://tfl.nu/7n4w
  Replies (3) Good night (423) Bad night (374)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?

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  (352): He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound? http://tfl.nu/fs09
  Replies (3) Good night (1158) Bad night (279)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"

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  (469): The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party" http://tfl.nu/vn3r
  Replies (0) Good night (841) Bad night (271)
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  (516): View more from New York

  like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked

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  (516): like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked http://tfl.nu/u8p9
  Replies (2) Good night (472) Bad night (148)

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