I'm lost and stupid without you.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina