kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
