omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
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he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
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DON'T WEAR PANTS.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.