For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
