omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
