I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
