I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
