It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
