is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
