That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
