I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
There's even glitter on my cock...
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