u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Randomize
