You really coming over, don't trick.
Girls should come with a carfax report
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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