the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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