He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
