..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize