hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
