When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
